February 2012
January 2012
If you smoke, that's cool. If you don't, that's...
Ceci: Did you think my Debut was fun...?
Me: Well....it was kind of awkward...we arn't that formal normally....and they were playing classical music while we were eating dinner..
Ceci: Really? They were playing Musical Music?
Me: ye----- .____________., Musical Music?
Ceci: Yeah they were playing Musical Music...I didn't hear?
Me: Im putting this on Tumblr......MUSICAL MUSIC???
Ceci: *stares at me with confused blonde face* (10 seconds pass) HAHAHAHA ooooooohhh I meant Classical Music :P
Her mind functions as slow as the slowest snails. : /
lovely-brains:
tacgnol:
24-month-old Deaf Child Having A Conversation
This is really fascinating.
Wow this is beautiful.
This is just amazing. Just simply beautiful. <3
<3
A conversation about marriage (with some...
Classmate #1: Like, I'm okay with gay people wanting to be with each other. But marriage should be between a guy and a girl.
Classmate #2: I don't even want to see it. Like, it's nasty.
Me: Oh my god! I know! My neighbor was talking about how he and his Jewish girlfriend wanna get married and I was like "Why should you two be allowed to get married?" in my head. I mean, why would they think it was okay for a Christian and a Jew to get married. Disgusting.
Classmates: ....
Me: And let me tell you about this other couple I saw making out at the mall. It was nasty. The boy was white and the girl was black. Can you believe that? Two people of different races being together? That's just wrong.
Classmate #2: What the hell is wrong with you? So what if they want to be together?
Classmate #1: Yeah, there isn't anything wrong with it.
Me: Are you kidding me? It's completely wrong.There is only one kind of marriage that is okay. And that is between a man and a woman of the same race, religious background, with the same income level and from the same place. We wouldn't want kids to think that diversity is okay. God wouldn't appreciate these people ruining the sanctity of marriage.
Classmate #1: Why are you even in this conversation? God loves everyone.
Me: What? So you're telling me that God doesn't care who you marry, because he loves everyone?
Classmate #1: Yeah...
Me: Does he love animals, too?
Classmate #1: He loves human and animals and living creatures all around.
Me: Whoa. That just blew my mind. Well it is a good thing that gay people can't get married then. Because everyone knows that gay people aren't human, or living for that matter. Haha.
Classmate #1: ....
Me: Go choke on a dick you stupid prick.
When My Friends Come Over And My Mom Tries To Be... →
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Me in 2012: I'm single! :)
Me in 2013: I'm still single!
Me in 2014: Still single...
Me in 20 years: Look at all these cats
Playing With Telemarketers
I was at home the other night in the middle of my dinner when the phone rang.
ME: Hello.
AT&T: Hello, this is AT&T.
ME: Is this AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: This is AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: Is this AT&T.?
AT&T: Yes! This is AT&T, may I speak to Mr. Byron, please?
ME: May I ask who is calling?
AT&T: This is AT&T.
ME: OK, hold on.
At this point I put the phone down for a solid 5 minutes thinking that, surely, this person would have hung up the phone. I ate my salad. Much to my surprise, when I picked up the receiver, they were still waiting.
ME: Hello?
AT&T: Is this Mr. Byron?
ME: May I ask who is calling, please?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: This is AT&T?
AT&T: Yes, this is AT&T ...
ME: The phone company.
AT&T: Yes, sir.
ME: I thought you said this was AT&T.
AT&T: Yes, sir, we are a phone company.
ME: I already have a phone.
AT&T: We aren't selling phones today, Mr. Byron. We would like to offer you 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year.
ME: Now, that's 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day?
AT&T: (getting a little excited at this point by my interest) Yes, sir, that's right! 24 hours a day!
ME: 7 days a week.?
AT&T: That's right.
ME: 365 days a year.?
AT&T: Yes, sir.
ME: I am definitely interested in that! Wow!!! That's amazing!
AT&T: We think so!
ME: That's quite a sum of money!
AT&T: Yes, sir, it's amazing how it adds up.
ME: OK, so will you send me checks weekly, monthly or just one big one at the end of the year for the full $52,560; and if you send an annual check, can I get a cash advance?
AT&T: Excuse me?
ME: You know, the 10 cents a minute.
AT&T: What are you talking about?
ME: You said you'd give me 10 cents a minute, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year. That comes to $144 per day, $1008 per week and $52,560 per year. I'm just interested in knowing how you will be making payment.
AT&T: Oh, no, sir. I didn't mean we'd be paying you. You pay us 10 cents a minute.
ME: Wait a minute, how do you figure that by saying that you'll give me 10 cents a minute, that I'll give YOU 10 cents a minute? Is this some kind of subliminal telemarketing scheme? I've read about things like this in the Enquirer, you know.
AT&T: No, sir, we are offering 10 cents a minute for
ME: THERE YOU GO AGAIN! Can I speak to a supervisor please?
AT&T: Sir, I don't think that is necessary.
ME: I insist on speaking to a supervisor!
AT&T: Yes, Mr. Byron. Please hold.
At this point, I begin trying to finish my dinner.
SUPERVISOR: Mr. Byron?
ME: Yeah.
SUPERVISOR: I understand you are not quite understanding our 10 cents a minute program.
ME: Is This A T &T?
SUPERVISOR: Yes, sir, it sure is.
ME: (I had to swallow before I choked on my food. It was all I could do to suppress my laughter and I had to be Careful not to produce a snort.) No, actually, I was just waiting for someone to
get back to me so that I could sign up for the plan.
SUPERVISOR: Ok, no problem, I'll transfer you back to the person who was helping you.
ME: Thank you.
I was on hold once again and managed a few more mouthfuls. I need to end this conversation. Suddenly, there was an aggravated but polite voice at the other end of the phone.
AT&T: Hello, Mr. Byron, I understand that you are interested in signing up for our plan.?
ME: No, but I was wondering - do you have that "Friends and Family"
thing because I'm an only child and I'd really like to have a little brother...
AT&T: click........
LOL i mess with online tutors dasfun too xD
We’ll be censoring all of Tumblr in order to...
erosconleche:
danielle-k:
carrots-cats-and-spoons:
1ds—got—that—one—thing:
stylin-like-hazza:
brokethetablewith1d:
dance-dance-baby:
ariddleinthedark:
-.-‘
..im scared now.
JUST INCASE!
YOU CAN NEVER BE TOO SAFE.
THE SOURCE OMG
is it true? i’ll reblog in case…
Just in case..lol
^
BUY YOUR QUEEN OF THE COURT:THE CARNIVAL TICKETS!...
REBLOGGGGG!
WHY
am I crying so much over this dance?